I like “we all draw at the same well”. We have different priorities and different goals. We have different cost models: what is a minor inconvenience for one person is a huge pain for another. And yet we share a common language and a common ecosystem, one that we all care about and all want to succeed.
If we yell at each other, we aren’t going to make that commons better. We have a better chance if we (somewhat dispassionately) share our varying priorities and cost models. It’s not a silver bullet – some goals are truly incompatible – but it’s the best shot we have.
Is the book you cite a good one? This one, right?